I wish all Muslims would join me in saying we are sorry that 19 of our fellow Muslims were only following their faith and fulfilling it to the letter when they entered Heaven on September 11th, 2001, May your God forgive us in all his Mercy and Compassion.

I apologize that we act in a manner that to you is irrational, vicious, inhumane, brutal, abominable, unconscionable, and in utter contempt for human dignity and sanctity of life, but for us to act thus is merely being orthodox to our faith and submissive to the Will of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful.

I am sorry that the entire Muslim world has reacted in revulsion and anger at the cartoons published at Jyllands-Posten but that we contain our revulsion and anger when the faithful blow themselves up in Palestine, May all the Jews die.

I am sorry we remain silent when our own women are beaten and raped in Pakistan in retribution for offenses of their husbands or fathers, but such is the Will of Allah and the Law of Sharia.

I am sorry we close our eyes when daughters are murdered by their fathers for the crime of loving another person without marriage or permission, for such actions shame our honor, for which we have much pride.

I am sorry that the whole of Islam said nothing when the Taliban brutally executed women for not wearing the Burka, for you know how much Islam is a religion of tolerance and peace.

I am sorry that we continue the ancient practise of female mutilation that has been going on since the days of the Prophet Issa (Jesus) or as we Muslims call it "al-jahiliyyah” (the age of ignorance), but it is important that only male Muslims enjoy the gift of sex lest women be carried to sin and adultery.

In all these things, verily know it is nothing personal, for indeed we treat our fellow Muslims with barbaric cruelty as well. We cannot help being what we are because our faith commands it so. I ask your understanding.

Signed, the obedient servant of Mohammed, peace be upon him,

Mukhtar al Jabani

OK, so I made this all up - of course no Muslim in the world has the honesty to apologize for the barbarity of his religion. And even if there were one with the honesty there would not be one brave enough to risk the death sentence for his apostasy.

Muslims have asked for an apology from the Danish Newspaper for insulting them. I would like an apology from one Muslim for the insult that Islam is to modern civilization. Just ONE.

UPDATE ************
The original post and fake apology were written by me on January 31, 2006. Now it seems there is ONE Muslim who has actually apologized for his religion:

Michelle Malkin,
12 Sep 2006,
An Arab-American apologizes

Read Emilio Karim Dabul in today's NY Post:

The only time I raised my voice in protest against these men who killed thousands of innocents in the name of Allah was behind closed doors, among the safety of friends and family. I did at one point write a very vitriolic essay condemning their actions, but fear of becoming another Salman Rushdie kept me from ever trying to publish it.

Well, I'm sick of saying the truth only in private - that Arabs around the world, including Arab-Americans like myself, need to start holding our own culture accountable for the insane, violent actions that our extremists have perpetrated on the world at large.

Perhaps I was wrong. Maybe there is ONE (1) Muslim out of 1.5 billion that is willing to admit his religion is responsible for terrorism. However, please note that he calls himself an Arab-American. Until he pronounces himself a Muslim I will still hold out for ONE real Muslim voice against Islam. Waiting.

COPENHAGEN, Denmark — The Muslim group spearheading criticism of a Danish newspaper for printing caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad said Tuesday it accepted the paper's apology, but Iraqi Muslims called for a commercial and diplomatic boycott of Denmark and Norway.

The 12 drawings, which included an image of the prophet wearing a turban shaped as a bomb with a burning fuse, sparked widespread anger in the Muslim world, including boycotts of Danish products.

Islamic tradition bars any depiction of the prophet, even respectful ones, out of concern that such images could lead to idolatry.

The Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten published an apology late Monday for the drawings.

Related blogs and news:

Stop the ACLU Blog, One Arab’s Apology

Courageous words. My friend, Lawhawk says it well in the comments at LGF.

Sometimes a movement can start with a lone voice. Let’s hope that his voice is joined by many others. And they’re going to need lots of help - especially against the vicious fundamentalists who hate having the obvious hatred and demonization of other religious viewpoints pointed out about their religious beliefs.