Who am I offending? from Planck's Constant

Mick didn't like spades but was happy to play with his brand new hoe in the garden and was soon tired after building a dyke of earth and rocks. "How Rosie my dyke looks," he remarked to himself, then went to his room to take a nap without taking a shower even though he had a wet back.

He didn't notice that he left soil on some of his toys and musical instruments; his mother was a niggard when it came to spending money on cleaning and would complain when she saw the dirty little Jew's Harp lying in the grass although she did keep her house very spic with nary a gook on anything in sight.

Luckily, his mother was gay that evening even though there was a nip in the air. In a fit of japery, she woke her son for dinner, "How is my nappy-headed hoe boy?" She noticed a small bump on his head, "who gave you that beaner, my dirty little Mick?"

"Oh, that, I was trying to fill in a chink in my dyke when I slipped on the slope and hit myself with the pole of the hoe." It made such a wop that pussy was spooked and ran away." His mother replied, "How queer!"

"Ask your father to come down to the table, Mick. Tell him to stop playing with his coins." Mick went to his father's room to notice his dad examining a Guinea. "I think someone gypped me on this coin." A fag lay burning in the ashtray. "Tell mom just to send me a cracker or Oreo and some milk."

offensive?
Photo: b r a d..

At dinner, he avoided the kraut and side dish of moulignon and chucked spears of asparagus off his dish.

After dinner, Mick watched the Animal Kingdom on TV, he loved watching coons play in the jungle, bunnies stuck under a porch, monkeys throwing coconuts at an ass; finger fish swimming in a pool; followed by a program on farming and what feedstuff to use to make your cock grow really big. Later he opened his present, abook from his Uncle Tom and hoary Aunt Jemima: "How to prick that boil." Mick thought to himself, "What boobs!"

That night, ready to sleep, Mick wondered where did the day go.